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adventureic2024-01-23 05:55 pm
lepreconned) wrote in adventureic2024-01-23 05:55 pm
(no subject)
Who: Leeds & Darcy
When: Tuesday, January 23
Where: Kitchen, Healing Department, Random storage room
What: Pizza robbery and an important question
Warnings: Nothing big
It’s not that Darcy was lying in wait outside of the kitchen (fingers itching for the cigarettes in her pocket because said waiting was taking far longer than she originally thought it would). She was just perfecting a lean against the opposite wall of the galley doors, mind consumed by one thing and one thing only: healing department free pizza.
Well two things, but pizza was the first.
She’d had a burst of productivity since the whole lesbian ghost business, this society of stone cold hotties a refreshing and constant source of inspiration with every awkward, beautiful, completely unhinged interaction. Darcy felt a little like she was in a zoo to be honest, a delightful zoo that was going to keep her full up with content for the next decade or so.
She’d been up all night sketching out a few prospective ideas for her latest novels, sustained by tobacco and wine alone. She needed to eat, and there was nothing more delicious than free food not meant for you, especially when free food that wasn't meant for you was being delivered by your current muse.
Ah, there was her guy.
“Leeds,” her grin was slow and cajoling as she greeted him. “What have you got there?”
The cook paused right in front of the doorway, his stillness punctuated by the kitchen doors swinging shut behind him. Almost comically so.
To his credit, Leeds didn't jump, but his eyes widened in surprise and there was a barely perceptible tightening of his grip on the pizza boxes. What was Darcy doing here?
A small beat before he recovered enough to reply in deadpan literalness, "Pizzas....?" He was of course, not unsure of what he had, but the general confusion at finding someone seemingly waiting right outside the kitchens was somewhat alarming.
Particularly when said someone smiled like that.
“I love pizza. These for Healing? Let me help you with them,” she didn’t give him so much as a breath to answer her, nimbly slouching forward to take two boxes off the top. “Shall we?”
She’d already turned down the hallway, slowing only to force the man to fall into stride next to her lest he watch her walk away with stolen pizzas.
“You make these yourself?”
"Yes... A few of us did. It would be very hard to make so many by myself..." Leeds replied once again, taking the questions quite literally, as he followed half a step behind like a minion.
He still wasn't sure what was going on or why he felt as if he was being ambushed and led to slaughter when this unknown redhead was in fact helping him deliver the pizzas.
How hard snuck through like an automatic pop up in her brain, an unfortunate conditioning since she started doing this career in earnest and not out of pettiness and a need to embarrass a few Unseelie Court blowhards.
“Well the food here is grand, we all really appreciate the sweat you put into making it and the way you fill out your white t-shirt.” She grinned at him, dizzingly sincere and overly friendly. The pizzas didn’t appear to be cumbersome or awkward despite her petite size, and somehow, her aviators stayed perfectly perched in the wild mane of red hair.
"Wha-at?" The question slipped out - almost goat-like - in a short stutter and whatever reply he was coming up went 'pop' like a balloon.
"Um... Thank you?" he replied, trying again, because that sounded like a compliment and Timmy had said Darcy had been flirting. (But weren't white t-shirts not fashion appropriate?) And even if it wasn't a compliment, he could at least pretend that he was responding to her earlier comment about food service. "Are you..." How was he going to phrase this? "-are you, um like- like- hitting on me?"
That turned her head, something sardonic but impressed in the curve of her smile as she slowed to a stop. “I could be. Do you want me to be?”
In that split second, Leeds wondered if he had offended her somehow and that Timmy was wrong but-
She arched a brow in question, unruffled and without expectation. He was pinned there, dark sparkling eyes threatening to swallow him whole when she said: “here we are. Healing Department.”
Leeds stayed silent. The only sound was the ever-so slight sound of the cardboard box crunching a little in his distress. The boxes that he held like a lifeline. Because quite frankly, he didn't know how to react and the urge to just run away was strong.
"Yes, um well. Here you are." he added weakly and quickly headed for the door, completely ignoring her question and pretending like he hadn't heard. Unfortunately the redness up to his ears was a good indication otherwise.
Darcy waited patiently for Leeds to finish handing off the pizzas, helpfully even as she passed him one of the boxes when he turned abruptly back towards her. But it didn't seem as if she was close enough to have been the one who made him nearly jump out of his skin in surprise.
“Alright,” she announced, the last pizza box very plainly still clutched in her hands, “I need a smoke. You smoke? ‘Course you do. Let’s get you that break, babe.”
It was impossible for him to lie, when the whole reason that he smoked was to cover up the smell of sulphur that lingered occasionally when he was human-shaped. So instead he smelled like nicotine. In any case, a smoke break would have likely helped calm his nerves, even if the source of those nerves was going to be right in his direct vicinity.
With all the panic over collapsing pocket dimensions, Darcy assumed that the (storage?) room she'd led them to was in fact a real room. Half this shit seemed to just appear out of nowhere these days, so one could never be too trusting. She didn’t personally care, the room itself had a few windows, a table and some chairs; but more importantly, if they did become trapped together with the pizza, that novel would probably write itself.
“Light?” Darcy waved said lighter at Leeds, voice muffled around the giant slice of pizza she’d dug into pretty much the second they’d stolen away.
"Thank...you."
He had his own but Leeds accepted it anyway, quickly going through the motions and taking a deep drag of his cigarette. He should probably have stopped her from keeping the one last pizza box for herself but it was too late now and at least it wasn't going to waste.
"Um. Why were you...um, waiting outside the kitchen?"
Darcy waved her half eaten slice of pizza, just like she had the lighter, in answer. “I was hungry,” she said simply, her other hand fumbling for her pocket where her own cigarettes rested. Two half hearted, clumsy attempts had her snapping her fingers instead and one appeared between the fingers of her free hand.
“Been working hard writin’ - mm, that sauce is divine - was very inspired after yesterday.” Her gaze wasn’t a leer, but it was awfully fixated on Leeds as she bit into the crust. “What’s your deal?”
"Deal? What- I don't know what you mean." Leeds answered, watching her from his peripherals, but not looking at her directly. There was something about how self-assured she was that had him avoiding her gaze. It was harder to do than expected given that they were the only two people in the room.
Darcy watched him, chewing thoughtfully if not a little gracelessly. “You’re some sort of goat demon, right? Do you mind just –” she extended her cigarette out to be lit.
This was a scenario he was familiar with.
Leeds shook his slightly, and produced his lighter instead. "I don't know but um I cannot- light things. The Wikipedia page has not like, said anything about demons but-" He stopped mid-sentence, realizing that he was babbling.
“I meant the lighter,” her smile was amused, though far gentler than he’d probably ever seen it. She let the end catch, before drawing the cigarette up to her mouth. “But I like where your mind goes. Wikipedia though?”
Since Darcy had already seen him, it didn't feel like he was revealing a big secret. He should have known that it would be harder to keep his identity secret amid so many people.
"I have a Wikipedia page. It is called the um- the Jersey Devil." he said in a practice monotone, "But not the sports team." he exhaled slowly, the cigarette smoke mingling with the smell of his own sulphuric breath.
Feckin’ yes! She almost wanted to fist pump. She knew it.
“Well that’s an idea,” she said, almost to herself, double fisting the last of her pizza slice and cigarette. “New Jersey Devils New Jersey Devil on ice romance… hockey erotica is in right now,” she shared with him conspiratorially, “it’s not for me personally, but I get it. It probably has a lot to do with toxic masculinity in sport and repression. And locker room junk,” she winked, taking another long inhale. “I could see you in the helmet, not that you need the butt pads.” Or whatever they were called.
Leeds just stared and wondered what the hell he had gotten himself into. In theory, he knew that the New Jersey Devils were a sports team who played ice hockey, but everything else Darcy was talking about went right over his head. He had never paid much attention to the team or what ice hockey was about. What were butt pads for?
"Um okay." was all he said, because he felt as though Darcy was expecting some sort of answer or acknowledgement to her outburst.
She took that last bite of her pizza, all crust, and chewed slowly. “You know who I am right?”
Somehow Leeds didn't think the answer he had was what she was looking for but he recited what he was told anyway, "You are Darcy, the leprechaun who writes romance and has a podcast."
Not bad, no embellishment, but all technically true. “I am,” she reached forward to grab another slice of pizza from the box, cigarette trailing ash behind her with the ungainly movement. “And what I’d like to do, is write one about you. Pizza?”
The confused expression on his face turned into a frown. "Why?" A genuine question, preceded by another intake. By then the cigarette was essentially exhausted and instead of lighting another, he turned to food. Pizza did sound good.
“You’re hot. You’ve got that whole…shy, timid, anxious thing that makes them all scream ‘I can fix him, I can bundle him up and show him some tender loving.’ And the goat thing,” she patted her hand to her chest like she just couldn’t contain herself. “Jersey Devil is an untapped market, do you know how many monsterfuckers, human or not, would go crazy for all of that?”
“I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, I know I come on strong, but you’ve got it, babe.” Her grin widened, a little sharp, a lot hopeful. “So let me have it?”
The Jersey Devil nibbled at his slice of pizza while he listened to how the Jersey Devil was hot and an untapped market. In a way, he felt somewhat detached to the idea. This must be how Bruce Wayne and the Batman felt. Part of him didn't quite believe her but he didn't want to interrupt or correct someone who was an expert in these matters. Hyacinthe had said she was quite good and Leeds trusted his judgement. However...
"According to Tumblr, the Jersey Devil is the most unfuckable cryptid so I don't think 'I've got it' as you say." he finally said after taking a moment to take it all in.
“The Jersey Devil will be the new Mothman in a matter of months,” she dismissed. “Booktok does most of the work for me, but you’ll be Tumblr’s cryptid of the month in no time.”
Mothman was the most beloved cryptid on Tumblr. In some circles it was sometimes Nessie. He hadn't considered ever being as well-loved as them on Tumblr. "Um- okay- Wow." He nodded, considering. "You can um- like have it."
Darcy settled back, the taste of triumph almost as good as stolen pizza. She revelled in it a little, treating herself with a long pull of nicotine. “Grand. Now the only question is,” she smiled, “hockey erotica or not?”
When: Tuesday, January 23
Where: Kitchen, Healing Department, Random storage room
What: Pizza robbery and an important question
Warnings: Nothing big
It’s not that Darcy was lying in wait outside of the kitchen (fingers itching for the cigarettes in her pocket because said waiting was taking far longer than she originally thought it would). She was just perfecting a lean against the opposite wall of the galley doors, mind consumed by one thing and one thing only: healing department free pizza.
Well two things, but pizza was the first.
She’d had a burst of productivity since the whole lesbian ghost business, this society of stone cold hotties a refreshing and constant source of inspiration with every awkward, beautiful, completely unhinged interaction. Darcy felt a little like she was in a zoo to be honest, a delightful zoo that was going to keep her full up with content for the next decade or so.
She’d been up all night sketching out a few prospective ideas for her latest novels, sustained by tobacco and wine alone. She needed to eat, and there was nothing more delicious than free food not meant for you, especially when free food that wasn't meant for you was being delivered by your current muse.
Ah, there was her guy.
“Leeds,” her grin was slow and cajoling as she greeted him. “What have you got there?”
The cook paused right in front of the doorway, his stillness punctuated by the kitchen doors swinging shut behind him. Almost comically so.
To his credit, Leeds didn't jump, but his eyes widened in surprise and there was a barely perceptible tightening of his grip on the pizza boxes. What was Darcy doing here?
A small beat before he recovered enough to reply in deadpan literalness, "Pizzas....?" He was of course, not unsure of what he had, but the general confusion at finding someone seemingly waiting right outside the kitchens was somewhat alarming.
Particularly when said someone smiled like that.
“I love pizza. These for Healing? Let me help you with them,” she didn’t give him so much as a breath to answer her, nimbly slouching forward to take two boxes off the top. “Shall we?”
She’d already turned down the hallway, slowing only to force the man to fall into stride next to her lest he watch her walk away with stolen pizzas.
“You make these yourself?”
"Yes... A few of us did. It would be very hard to make so many by myself..." Leeds replied once again, taking the questions quite literally, as he followed half a step behind like a minion.
He still wasn't sure what was going on or why he felt as if he was being ambushed and led to slaughter when this unknown redhead was in fact helping him deliver the pizzas.
How hard snuck through like an automatic pop up in her brain, an unfortunate conditioning since she started doing this career in earnest and not out of pettiness and a need to embarrass a few Unseelie Court blowhards.
“Well the food here is grand, we all really appreciate the sweat you put into making it and the way you fill out your white t-shirt.” She grinned at him, dizzingly sincere and overly friendly. The pizzas didn’t appear to be cumbersome or awkward despite her petite size, and somehow, her aviators stayed perfectly perched in the wild mane of red hair.
"Wha-at?" The question slipped out - almost goat-like - in a short stutter and whatever reply he was coming up went 'pop' like a balloon.
"Um... Thank you?" he replied, trying again, because that sounded like a compliment and Timmy had said Darcy had been flirting. (But weren't white t-shirts not fashion appropriate?) And even if it wasn't a compliment, he could at least pretend that he was responding to her earlier comment about food service. "Are you..." How was he going to phrase this? "-are you, um like- like- hitting on me?"
That turned her head, something sardonic but impressed in the curve of her smile as she slowed to a stop. “I could be. Do you want me to be?”
In that split second, Leeds wondered if he had offended her somehow and that Timmy was wrong but-
She arched a brow in question, unruffled and without expectation. He was pinned there, dark sparkling eyes threatening to swallow him whole when she said: “here we are. Healing Department.”
Leeds stayed silent. The only sound was the ever-so slight sound of the cardboard box crunching a little in his distress. The boxes that he held like a lifeline. Because quite frankly, he didn't know how to react and the urge to just run away was strong.
"Yes, um well. Here you are." he added weakly and quickly headed for the door, completely ignoring her question and pretending like he hadn't heard. Unfortunately the redness up to his ears was a good indication otherwise.
Darcy waited patiently for Leeds to finish handing off the pizzas, helpfully even as she passed him one of the boxes when he turned abruptly back towards her. But it didn't seem as if she was close enough to have been the one who made him nearly jump out of his skin in surprise.
“Alright,” she announced, the last pizza box very plainly still clutched in her hands, “I need a smoke. You smoke? ‘Course you do. Let’s get you that break, babe.”
It was impossible for him to lie, when the whole reason that he smoked was to cover up the smell of sulphur that lingered occasionally when he was human-shaped. So instead he smelled like nicotine. In any case, a smoke break would have likely helped calm his nerves, even if the source of those nerves was going to be right in his direct vicinity.
With all the panic over collapsing pocket dimensions, Darcy assumed that the (storage?) room she'd led them to was in fact a real room. Half this shit seemed to just appear out of nowhere these days, so one could never be too trusting. She didn’t personally care, the room itself had a few windows, a table and some chairs; but more importantly, if they did become trapped together with the pizza, that novel would probably write itself.
“Light?” Darcy waved said lighter at Leeds, voice muffled around the giant slice of pizza she’d dug into pretty much the second they’d stolen away.
"Thank...you."
He had his own but Leeds accepted it anyway, quickly going through the motions and taking a deep drag of his cigarette. He should probably have stopped her from keeping the one last pizza box for herself but it was too late now and at least it wasn't going to waste.
"Um. Why were you...um, waiting outside the kitchen?"
Darcy waved her half eaten slice of pizza, just like she had the lighter, in answer. “I was hungry,” she said simply, her other hand fumbling for her pocket where her own cigarettes rested. Two half hearted, clumsy attempts had her snapping her fingers instead and one appeared between the fingers of her free hand.
“Been working hard writin’ - mm, that sauce is divine - was very inspired after yesterday.” Her gaze wasn’t a leer, but it was awfully fixated on Leeds as she bit into the crust. “What’s your deal?”
"Deal? What- I don't know what you mean." Leeds answered, watching her from his peripherals, but not looking at her directly. There was something about how self-assured she was that had him avoiding her gaze. It was harder to do than expected given that they were the only two people in the room.
Darcy watched him, chewing thoughtfully if not a little gracelessly. “You’re some sort of goat demon, right? Do you mind just –” she extended her cigarette out to be lit.
This was a scenario he was familiar with.
Leeds shook his slightly, and produced his lighter instead. "I don't know but um I cannot- light things. The Wikipedia page has not like, said anything about demons but-" He stopped mid-sentence, realizing that he was babbling.
“I meant the lighter,” her smile was amused, though far gentler than he’d probably ever seen it. She let the end catch, before drawing the cigarette up to her mouth. “But I like where your mind goes. Wikipedia though?”
Since Darcy had already seen him, it didn't feel like he was revealing a big secret. He should have known that it would be harder to keep his identity secret amid so many people.
"I have a Wikipedia page. It is called the um- the Jersey Devil." he said in a practice monotone, "But not the sports team." he exhaled slowly, the cigarette smoke mingling with the smell of his own sulphuric breath.
Feckin’ yes! She almost wanted to fist pump. She knew it.
“Well that’s an idea,” she said, almost to herself, double fisting the last of her pizza slice and cigarette. “New Jersey Devils New Jersey Devil on ice romance… hockey erotica is in right now,” she shared with him conspiratorially, “it’s not for me personally, but I get it. It probably has a lot to do with toxic masculinity in sport and repression. And locker room junk,” she winked, taking another long inhale. “I could see you in the helmet, not that you need the butt pads.” Or whatever they were called.
Leeds just stared and wondered what the hell he had gotten himself into. In theory, he knew that the New Jersey Devils were a sports team who played ice hockey, but everything else Darcy was talking about went right over his head. He had never paid much attention to the team or what ice hockey was about. What were butt pads for?
"Um okay." was all he said, because he felt as though Darcy was expecting some sort of answer or acknowledgement to her outburst.
She took that last bite of her pizza, all crust, and chewed slowly. “You know who I am right?”
Somehow Leeds didn't think the answer he had was what she was looking for but he recited what he was told anyway, "You are Darcy, the leprechaun who writes romance and has a podcast."
Not bad, no embellishment, but all technically true. “I am,” she reached forward to grab another slice of pizza from the box, cigarette trailing ash behind her with the ungainly movement. “And what I’d like to do, is write one about you. Pizza?”
The confused expression on his face turned into a frown. "Why?" A genuine question, preceded by another intake. By then the cigarette was essentially exhausted and instead of lighting another, he turned to food. Pizza did sound good.
“You’re hot. You’ve got that whole…shy, timid, anxious thing that makes them all scream ‘I can fix him, I can bundle him up and show him some tender loving.’ And the goat thing,” she patted her hand to her chest like she just couldn’t contain herself. “Jersey Devil is an untapped market, do you know how many monsterfuckers, human or not, would go crazy for all of that?”
“I’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, I know I come on strong, but you’ve got it, babe.” Her grin widened, a little sharp, a lot hopeful. “So let me have it?”
The Jersey Devil nibbled at his slice of pizza while he listened to how the Jersey Devil was hot and an untapped market. In a way, he felt somewhat detached to the idea. This must be how Bruce Wayne and the Batman felt. Part of him didn't quite believe her but he didn't want to interrupt or correct someone who was an expert in these matters. Hyacinthe had said she was quite good and Leeds trusted his judgement. However...
"According to Tumblr, the Jersey Devil is the most unfuckable cryptid so I don't think 'I've got it' as you say." he finally said after taking a moment to take it all in.
“The Jersey Devil will be the new Mothman in a matter of months,” she dismissed. “Booktok does most of the work for me, but you’ll be Tumblr’s cryptid of the month in no time.”
Mothman was the most beloved cryptid on Tumblr. In some circles it was sometimes Nessie. He hadn't considered ever being as well-loved as them on Tumblr. "Um- okay- Wow." He nodded, considering. "You can um- like have it."
Darcy settled back, the taste of triumph almost as good as stolen pizza. She revelled in it a little, treating herself with a long pull of nicotine. “Grand. Now the only question is,” she smiled, “hockey erotica or not?”